An eight-year-old kid swaggered into the lounge and demanded of the barmaid, “Give me a double Scotch on the rocks.” “What do you want to do, get me in trouble?” the barmaid asked. “Maybe later,” the kid said. “Right now, I just want the Scotch.”
Category Archive: Kids Jokes
Funny jokes and kids jokes for children of all ages.
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Telephone Funny Jokes
What is the cheapest time to call your friends long distance? When they’re not home! When doesn’t a telephone work underwater? When it’s wringing wet! Caller: Operator! Operator! Do you know my boyfriend’s line has been busy for an hour? Operator: No, but if you hum a few bars, I might be able to sing …
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Labor Day Funny Jokes
Dad: “Most people don’t have to work today, because it’s Labour Day.” Son: “If they’re not working, shouldn’t it be `No-Labour Day?” What do you usually do on Labour Day? As little as possible, just like every day! Why did you think someone was about to have a baby? Because you said it was Labour …
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Easter Funny Jokes for Kids
What do you get if you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies! How does the Easter Bunny stay fit? EGG-xercise and HARE-robics! What’s the difference between a counterfeit dollar bill and a crazy rabbit? One is bad money, the other is a mad bunny! Why did the Easter egg hide? He …
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Today funny jokes 08.11
One day little Johnny came home from school and asked his mom about curting. Flustered, she replied, “Tonight go watch your sister when she comes home with her boyfriend. That’s courting.” The next day, Johnny tells his mother what happened. “Well, Sis and her boyfriend came home last night and sat on the couch. They …
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Chicken jokes 01
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A: Because chickens hadn’t evolved yet Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A: To get to the shell station Q: Why did the chewing gum cross the road? A: Because it was stuck to the chicken! Q: Why did the horse cross the road? A: …
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Bird jokes 01
Q: Why did the owl, owl? A: Because the woodpecker would peck ‘er! Q: What is a polygon? A: A dead parrot! Q: What flies through the jungle singing opera? A: The parrots of Penzance! Q: What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework? A: A firequaker! Q: What is a …
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Bear jokes 01
Q: What kind of money to polo bears use? A: Ice lolly! Q: Have you ever hunted bear? A: No, but I’ve been shooting in my shorts! Q: How do you start a teddy bear race? A: Ready, teddy, go! Q: What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp? A: …
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Caterpillar jokes
What does a caterpillar do on New Years Day? Turns over a new leaf! What is the definition of a caterpillar? A worm in a fur coat! What has stripes and pulls a tractor? A caterpillar tractor! What does a cat go to sleep on? A caterpillow! What’s green and dangerous? A caterpillar with a …
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Next Joke Ant jokes 01
Where do ants go for their holidays? Frants! What do you call an ant who skips school? A truant! What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics? All sorts of antics! What do you call a greedy ant? An anteater! Why did the elephant put his trunk across the path? To …
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